Twitter Reacts as Real Madrid Becoming the Laughing Stock of the Champions League

?Real Madrid. The Real Madrid team who just recently won three Champions League trophies in a row and four in five years. The Real Madrid who have won the competition 13 times. The Real Madrid who are the biggest club in the world. Well, that Real Madrid, are now a team who just can’t seem to hack it in Europe. They can’t really seem to hack it anywhere right now.

After being thumped by Ajax in the round of 16 last season, their European woes continued with another bruising at PSG.

Madrid just never got going. Aside from Gareth Bale and James Rodriguez, no one even played remotely well. It was worse than poor.


To rub salt in the wounds, it was former Real Madrid man Angel Di Maria who scored the goals to inflict defeat on the Spanish side.

Di Maria’s first goal came from an error from ?Thibaut Courtois. The Belgian has struggled in Spain, and this remarkable stat just about sums it up.

You can imagine Chelsea fans right now, revelling in the failings of their former goalkeeper, making a howler on the biggest stage. Chelsea Twitter was having a field day.

It seems like Blues fans had already forgotten about their loss to Valencia, and if anything, a Courtois mistake was as good as a Chelsea win.

If only ?Madrid had a top goalkeeper in their ranks to take the Belgian’s place. Oh wait, he was on the other team…

Angel Di Maria really loves the big stage. Every time you switch on to watch a PSG game in the Champions League, he seems to score one or two goals.

Real Madrid should be looking at signing a player like him. Seems exactly like a potential Los Blancos player…

A lot of eyes were on Real Madrid new signing ?Eden Hazard. A joyful footballer. One of the world’s best. Surely the man to turn around Madrid’s fortunes.

Based on this performance, probably not…

In the future maybe though…once he loses a bit of weight.

In all seriousness, praise has to go to PSG. They are heading in the right direction, and they seem to have – finally – struck the right balance between defence and attack.

A lot of that seems to be down to the signing of Idrissa Gueye. Twitter was impressed too.

A pleasant night then all in all for PSG, but they shouldn’t get too excited though. They’ll face a lot more difficult challenges in Europe this season and across the next few weeks – for example, Brugge and Galatasaray.

I’d say I feel bad for Real Madrid fans. But I don’t. Three back to back Champions League wins is enough success to last a lifetime. They’ll just spend hundreds of millions of pounds next summer to sort out their problems and get back to the top again. They’ll be just fine.


PSG 3-0 Real Madrid: Report, Ratings & Reaction as Angel Di Maria Outclasses Former Side

?A much anticipated Champions League group game between two of Europe’s strongest teams ended with PSG claiming all three points, as the French champions were simply too good for a Real Madrid side who looked short of ideas. 

PSG started the better team, with a goal inside the first 15 minutes, courtesy of Angel Di Maria. However, huge questions will be raised over Thibaut Courtois, who let the ball in at his near post.


Real Madrid posed one or two early problems for the PSG defence. Eden Hazard fizzed an early shot just wide shortly after Di Maria’s goal.

That was the best Madrid could hope for. They were just not in the game at all after that. Di Maria then doubled the lead for the French side 20 minutes later, with a cracking shot from the edge of the box.

Later in the first half, Gareth Bale thought he had scored an unbelievable goal, volleying the ball over the head of Keylor Navas, but it was ruled out, after VAR intervention, for a handball. 


The second half continued in the same fashion, with PSG dominating and creating chance after chance, and Madrid unable to outdo the magnificent Idrissa Gueye in midfield.

?Karim Benzema thought he had scored Real’s first goal of the game, but again, ruled out for offside.

PSG made it three in added time, with the full backs linking up superbly when through on the Madrid goal. Thomas Meunier ended up slotting home after some brilliant play between himself and Bernat.



Key Talking Point

With no ?Kylian Mbappe and Neymar, how would PSG cope? Their two best players were out with an injury and suspension respectively.

However, Argentine Angel Di Maria stepped up in their absence. Di Maria enjoys these big Champions League nights. He showed that again with a high quality performance.


His confidence on the ball and ability to go past players is of the highest order, and it was capped off with two goals to put the game to bed early on.

Player Ratings

Starting XI: Navas (7); Meunier (8), Silva (7), Kimpembe (6), Bernat (7); Marquinhos (7), Gueye (9*), Veratti (7); Sarabia (7), Icardi (7); Di Maria (8)

Subs: Choupo-Moting (7), Herrera (6), Diallo (N/A)


It’s not often that a player who scores twice and plays brilliantly doesn’t get the star man award. I could have easily given it to Di Maria.

But for years, PSG have been wondering why they just can’t crack the Champions League? They have all the best offensive players in the world, but what’s missing?

The answer may just be Idrissa Gueye. He was phenomenal. Signed from Everton for around £30m (a bargain in this day and age), the midfielder was EVERYWHERE. Single-handedly, he ran the Madrid midfield ragged.

Adding a vital balance in midfield alongside Marco Verratti and Marquinhos, Gueye might just be the missing piece in PSG’s attempted conquest of Europe. 



Key Talking Point

Many were curious as to how Real Madrid would bounce back – especially in Europe – after a very average 2018/19 campaign. 

However, things are looking bad for Spanish side. They were awful on the night. Their midfield was pedestrian, full backs woeful, and their forwards – barring Bale – played like they were pulling a tractor.


If things continue like this, then Madrid fans will be worried. They could be in for another long season.

Player Ratings

Starting XI: Courtois (4); Carvajal (4), Militao (6), Varane (5), Mendy (4); Casemiro (5), Kroos (4), James (7); Bale (7), Benzema (6); Hazard (4).

Subs: Vasquez (5), Jovic (6), Vinicius Junior (6).


Zinedine Zidane was so desperate to get rid of Bale all summer, yet the Welshman was by far, Real Madrid’s best player. Alongside James Rodriguez, he was really the only player who played well.

Bale was lively and aggressive in the first half, looking to take on Bernat at every opportunity. On his day, the winger is simply unplayable.

He even had a truly stunning goal ruled out by VAR for handball. That goal would have capped off a very good first half performance for Bale, as he seemed to disappear a bit more in the second half.

Looking Ahead

PSG are genuine Champions League contenders. We say this every season, but this year, something feels right about them.

The balance in midfield that has been sorely lacking year after year is spot on, with Gueye adding that bite. They really should go deep in the competition this year.


Real Madrid, on the other hand, don’t have a chance. It is as simple as that. Their swagger is gone. They are no longer formidable. An ageing midfield accompanied by some weak defenders is a recipe for disaster.

The players just don’t seem to be up for it either. They don’t care anymore. Something has to change at the club, but regardless, Madrid are in for a long, long season.


Eden Hazard Shouldn’t Be Surprised That Real Madrid Supporters Are ‘Fanatical’ About Winning

?Real Madrid forward Eden Hazard can hardly be surprised that fans at the Bernabeu take losing far worse than anything he experienced at Chelsea, with the Belgian admitting that Los Blancos supporters are much more ‘fanatical’ about their team than he was used to in England.

Real fans are not known for their forgiving nature, with Sergio Ramos, Cristiano Ronaldo and Gareth Bale among the superstars who have been booed by their own supporters. Meanwhile, legend Iker Casillas was ultimately treated poorly by the club despite giving 25 years to Real.


Hazard has claimed that losing a game at Chelsea was ‘disappointing’, sure, but was never seen as a ‘disaster’, and he is already well aware that things are not so in the Spanish capital.

The 28-year-old, who missed the first three games of the season following his €100m – potentially rising to €145m – move from Chelsea, is yet to find out the consequences of losing. His sole appearance so far came as a substitute in a 3-2 win over Levante over the weekend.

And yet he knows that defeat is not an option if he wants to stay on the right side of a fan group that has intense expectations beyond that of any other club in the world.

“At Chelsea when we lost, we were disappointed, like the fans, but I never felt it was a disaster, it’s different in Spain,” Hazard has revealed in an official Champions League interview.

Eden Hazard

“I think that here the fans are really fans, football is everything to them and they need players to give everything, in England there aren’t so many fans.

“Of course, people there like football and everyone, be that young people, adults or teenagers, is really interested in football, but they aren’t so fanatical about their teams.”

His comments may come across as disrespectful towards Chelsea fans, and in England in general, but the Belgian is just trying to express the circumstances he now finds himself in.

Rarely has a club in England been used to winning over an extended period. Teams rise to the top and fall away at regular intervals and things have long been much more competitive.

Eden Hazard

In Spain, Real Madrid and Barcelona have dominated La Liga since its inception 90 years ago, winning 59 titles between them – Real alone have won 33. Only once since 1951 has neither club finished in the top three, while just four titles so far this century were won by other sides.

It is only natural that fan expectations should be higher than in a country like England where 24 different clubs have been crowned champions, as opposed to just nine in Spain.

Hazard may yet find about just how ‘fanatical’ supporters in Spain can get when things don’t go to plan.


Champions League: Picking a Combined XI From Teams in Group A

The Champions League group stage is about to get underway, in which teams split into eight different groups to try and battle it out for a place in the knockout round.

Group A will see Real Madrid, Paris Saint-Germain, Galatasaray and Club Brugge clash with one another, but only two of those sides can make it through. This is one of those groups which looks fairly simple to predict, but football has a funny way of throwing curve balls.

?Here’s a combined XI of all four sides, and I bet you can’t guess which two are going to dominate it…

Goalkeeper & Defenders


Thibaut Courtois (GK) – The temptation to go with ex-Liverpool? man Simon Mignolet is huge, but ?Courtois probably (definitely) just edges it.? On his day, the Belgian is up there amongst the best in the world, and he will be vital to ?Real‘s chances of progressing.

Dani Carvajal (RB) – If this was a few years in the future, PSG’s Colin Dagba would probably deserve the spot, but it’s Carvajal’s to lose at the minute. Always one of Real’s most dependable players, the Spaniard rarely disappoints.

Thiago Silva (CB) – With Silva leading the side, PSG have developed into a real force to be reckoned with. He continues to perform at an elite level, and he will likely be one of the ?Champions League’s top performers this year.

Sergio Ramos (CB) – ?Ramos has been one of the world’s best defenders for years now, and he still looks to be as good as ever. With a love of scoring goals and getting sent off, you won’t want to take your eyes off Ramos.

Marcelo (LB) – Ferland Mendy is coming for his throne, but ?Marcelo keeps his spot for the time being. He prefers to do his defending in the attacking third, which always makes for exciting viewing.


Luca Modric

Marco Verratti (DM) – There isn’t a team in Europe who wouldn’t want Verratti in their ranks. The diminutive Italian is phenomenal defensively, and his ability with the ball at his feet is utterly superb. He has mastered his role, and he makes PSG so much better than they already are anyway.

Luka Modric (CM) – What is there left to say about ?Modric? The Croatian is an incredible footballer who is capable of pulling the strings for Real with ease. There’s a reason he won the Ballon d’Or last year.

Toni Kroos (CM) – This third spot is a tough one. Galatasaray’s Younes Belhanda and Brugge’s Hans Vanaken are both solid candidates, but it’s difficult to overlook ?Kroos. Like Modric, Kroos is a midfield maestro, and he’s also reliable defensively. If he gets going, he’s a defender’s nightmare.



Neymar (RW) – The forward line is fairly self-explanatory. Let’s kick things off with ?Neymar, who is amongst the best wingers in world football, let alone Group A. The Brazilian is a magician with the ball, and he is capable of dancing around defenders with ease. If PSG are to top this group, they will need big performances from Neymar when he returns from suspension.

Kylian Mbappe (ST) – Like Neymar, ?Mbappe is in that upper echelon of global superstars. He can score and create goals with frightening ease, and he will certainly be expecting to finish the competition as one of the top scorers. However, keep an eye out for Falcao and Mbaye Diagne of Galatasaray and Brugge respectively, who will both ask questions of defenders this year.

Eden Hazard (LW) – The final piece in the most obvious trio in history, ?Hazard is also an elite talent. His frightening blend of pace, agility and dribbling makes him almost impossible to stop, and if he can continue to add goals to his game, then he will be even better. Brugge’s Krepin Diatta has the potential to be one of Group A’s best-kept secrets, but this should be all about Hazard.


The Jerry Seinfeld 2019/20 UEFA Champions League Preview

‘What’s going onnnnn?!!!’

I’ll tell you what’s going on Jerry, the UEFA Champions League is back this week, and it’s been confirmed that your sitcom – Seinfeld – is set to hit Netflix in 2021. 

And to celebrate these two great bits of news, we’ll pour out ?a little bit of the bubbly, and re-work/butcher some of the Jerry Seinfeld’s best jokes to preview each of the eight ?UEFA Champions League groups. 

Group A


Club Brugge, Galatasaray, Paris Saint-Germain, Real Madrid

My theory is 98% of all football played in Group A is merely killing time. 

Let’s face it, we don’t really want to watch Club Brugge or Galatasaray play football, do we? 

‘F**k no.’

That’s what I thought. 

Group B


Bayern Munich, Red Star Belgrade/Crvena Zvezda, Olympiacos, Tottenham Hotspur

Jerry Seinfeld once said: “there’s no such thing as fun for the whole family”, and he was WRONG, because Group B really is fun for the whole family.

We have the blockbuster heavyweight clash between ?Bayern Munich and ?Tottenham Hotspur for your Dad and his tin of Carlsberg.

Crvena Zvezda for your hipster son to try and pronounce and pretend he’s heard of.

Mauricio Pochettino as eye candy for your mother.

And the wonderful city of Athens for your daughter, just back from interrailing, to cite as the ‘third nicest city’ she was in during the summer. 

Fun for the whole family. 

Group C

Pep Guardiola

Atalanta, Dinamo Zagreb, Manchester City, Shakhtar Donetsk

Men don’t care about what’s happening in Group C, they care about what’s happening in Group D. So, moving on…

Group D

Cristiano Ronaldo

Atletico Madrid, Bayer Leverkusen, Juventus, Lokomotiv Moscow

I tell you what I like about ?Atletico Madrid, they’re hanging in there with the park the bus football, aren’t they? You know they’ve seen the Gegenpress. They’re staying with the bus. I’m impressed by that.

I tell you what I don’t like about ?Juventus, they’re chopping and changing at every opportunity, aren’t they? You know they’ve seen how continuity breeds success. But they’re staying with the reactionary decision making. I’m not impressed by that. 

Group E


Genk, Liverpool, SSC Napoli, Red Bull Salzburg

The Gegenpress is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that football managers are still thinking for themselves. 

Jurgen Klopp is one of the only managers in world football that’s not trying to copy Pep Guardiola, and you have to respect that. 

Group F


Barcelona, Borussia Dortmund, Inter, Slavia Prague

Group F is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have the top for it. Anything can come out of it at any point in the near future…except for Slavia Prague. Obviously.

Group G

Timo Werner

Benfica, Olympique Lyonnais, RB Leipzig, Zenit St Petersburg

It’s incredible that everything that could possibly happen in Group G can be summed up in exactly two words: 

Who cares? 

Group H

Tammy Abraham

Ajax, Chelsea, LOSC Lille, Valencia

Group H is thought of by many as the most competitive, and therefore best, of all of the UEFA Champions League groups this season. So if Group H is the best group, why are you watching E instead?